08/02/2017

08. It's Okay To Be Selfish


The other day I came across a video (or was it a Vine?) on Facebook where a guy said about how it's perfectly fine for us to be selfish especially when we're still at our youth. The video made me think about how people are so terrified to be selfish when in truth, human beings have always been selfish creatures. I am selfish, you are selfish, everybody else is selfish and that's the truth. So why are we pretending like that's not how it is? I think what the guy in the video said was right, that we all have the privilege to be selfish, especially during our youth.

Here's the thing: society insists that we should all be selfless because we were taught that selflessness is equivalent to kindness while selfishness is equivalent to all the negative adjectives you could possibly find on Oxford dictionary. And even though this principle is not entirely wrong in some cases, it is not right to use them against us as a way to manipulate and suppress the privilege we are entitled in. I remember back in the days when I saw my classmates and friends not being able to decide on which major they should pursue and I heard a lot of them saying, "I wanted to pursue this but my parents have been telling me to pursue that" and in a way, it kind of gives me this thought about how some people have to give up what they want to do just to make other people happy. It doesn't matter if it's something as simple as choosing a major for your future, the decision can just be about anything!

I get accused for being selfish a lot of times, mainly from adults around me and my family. It's ironic when you think about it because the other person who accuses you of being selfish is actually being selfish too. Think about it: if I were to point and accuse you for wanting to have it your way, isn't that an alternative way of me asking you to do things my way? I don't think people can be completely selfless. I think as people, we are always going to be selfish, one way or another. It's human nature, just like how we can never be completely non-judgmental towards others. Selflessness is overrated because everyone wants to embrace it so we can be good, so we can fit into society's definition of good. We are afraid to embrace selfishness because we don't like being told about our true nature.

One of the very many interpretation and definition led by society regarding the act of selflessness is to think about others first and ourselves second. That's not right. That's unfair. We should look after ourselves first; we should care about our happiness, what we want and what makes us happy. Nobody in this world is responsible for your happiness. This is the thing that a lot of people have yet to fully accept. I guess we all like to be served than to serve ourselves.

I'm scared of quite a few things in life but being selfish is not one of them. It's tough for me to embrace selflessness and a lot easier for me to be selfish. I don't mean to say that I'm a "me me me" kind of person all the time; what I mean to say is that I care about what I want because I know in the end, the one who has to go through this life of mine is me. I guess what I meant to say is: always disagree to give up on your privilege or happiness just because someone tells you to do so in order to make them happy.

If you're in your youth and you want to pursue that specific college degree, go take it. If you are someone who wants to do things based on your time then look at your clock and yours only. If you want to live as a free wild-spirited youth then live it. If you want to quit and find another opportunity,  do it. If you have things you want to do, do it. Don't be afraid to be selfish, it's perfectly fine to embrace it. Taking the chances that you want is not selfish. Wanting to pursue your passion is not selfish.

Wanna know who's selfish? The people who insist you give up your happiness for them.


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